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What to do when you just don’t know what you should be doing…

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You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You’re on your own, and you know what you know. And you are the guy who’ll decide where to go. – Dr. Suess

I really enjoy Dr.Suess stories! Wocket in my pocket is a favorite I’ve read to my son countless times.

Us grownups have to make a lot of choices. Every day you are faced with a multitude of decisions that have to be made. Forced to choose between this and that…

I feel that the majority of my day is spent making decisions for other people and rarely for myself.

Being a “manager” of sorts at work means I am a captain of a ship. Setting a course by typing notes with a keyboard rather than the use of a helm. One email to adjust course this way, and an instant message to dispatch another ship off in another direction. Maybe an admiral rather than a captain. Maybe a promotion is in order!

The problem is that I spend my waking hours sending commands to various ships at sea and I then struggle to plot a course of my own.

I once read that some of the so-called important people in society wear the exact same clothes each day in order to preserve their decision making energy for business at hand. Is that really what we have come too? That our lives have become so burdened with choices that we need to restrict where we focus our energy.

The world has certainly become a noisy place, and by the end of the day the most difficult question to answer is “whats for dinner”?

I sometimes wonder if others struggle as much as I do in order to decide how to tackle their personal projects. Once I’ve found some free time, and not completely exhausted from ship steering, how should I spend it?

Do I work on some writing, or catch up on some reading, or should I just go do some dishes?

So what do you do, when you just don’t know what you should be doing?

New year and so much to do…

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It’s a new year, so time to get to work…

I’ve never been good at sticking to new year resolutions, but I’m going to make a good go of it in 2018. There is so much I want to accomplish that I haven’t decided where I want to start.

Most people would tell you to set small attainable goals in order to not be overwhelmed and actually reach some tangible results. I don’t want to aim too small though, so rather I plan to break down large projects into parts spread out through the year. I’m also trying a new productivity system this year as well, so this will be one big experiment.

Let’s start with a general list, and make a plan from there. Here we go…

Writing what I want…

I’ve been struggling to find topics to write about. This has come about with too much research about how to get people to follow your work. I’m sure many people are in the same boat. You need to this, that, and all this other stuff.

I plan to get past this by not really having a writing strategy this year. Write more to see what I like to write about. Commit to the act of writing more regularly and build a habit. No niche, no standard format or branding. Just words.

My writing in 2018 is going to consist of blog posts and short stories as they come to mind. Putting pen to paper, or fingers to keys on a regular basis.

Learn some real tech stuff…

I’ve been dipping my toes into the world of coding, and am really attracted to web design. So, I’m making a commitment to learning the fundamentals of HTML, CSS, and Javascript this year. I have this website I can play with, so stick around to see where this goes.

I also plan to tackle SQL, and hope to work this into my day job as well.

Product management and UX design…

Another area I have really become interested in is all facets of product management and UX design. A pretty wide scope of topics here so got to narrow this one down.

Content marketing…

Marketing is towards the bottom of my list, however, will be beneficial to the overall writing experience. I would like people to actually read some of my stuff…

Now what?

Now that I know what I want to do, the next step is to formulate a plan to work on all of this stuff. That should be easy with a full-time job and family responsibilities. Many have said that if you really want to accomplish something, you will make the time for it. More to come!

Taking comfort in being ordinary

I’m okay with living what some would consider an ordinary life. The effect of social media has raised most people’s expectations of what life should really be like. 

You see nothing but the good stuff. The traveling and grand accomplishments, but not the work or the unpretty tasks that got them there. 

Or worse, it could be the opposite. Those that show constant misery, and do nothing to improve their situation. Maybe it’s the attention received from all the sympathy comments. 

It’s okay to find a spot somewhere in the middle where real life exists. The place where you find a good mix of fun derived from sweat equity. Drinking that beer in your backyard with close friends rather than some fancy downtown rooftop bar. Enjoying a nice staycation rather than maxing the credit card for that trip to Paris. 

Should I envy those putting forth the money and effort put on a fancy show when I can do the same thing at home? And for far less money? 

Don’t get me wrong here. I’ve got my own bucket list, and love a good trip every now and then, but the ads and “influencer’s” push it too far. 

I don’t need some dude standing next to a row of super expensive cars, or the seat of a private jet telling me how easy it is to 10X my life. These people don’t represent real life.   

Not every day is going to be the Superbowl. Not every month is going to see record sales, and that’s okay. Somethings need to be hard, and you need to have a bad day every now and then. The sweet wouldn’t be sweet without the sour. 

We need to know suffering in order to feel joy. You would never know the relief of shedding the weight of a major problem without first carrying the burden. 

By showing each other nothing but the best part of our lives, and allowing internet personalities to tell us what is important, we’re losing touch with reality. Setting expectations of each other that can never be reached. The truth is that life is hard and that there is no way around it. You are, however, in the driver’s seat and can decide how much it will suck. 

We just aren’t meant to be happy all the time. Don’t take someone’s Facebook feed as a true representation of their everyday life. Don’t compare yourself to others based on only what they want you to see. 

If you need someone to compare yourself too, look in the mirror. Does that look like the person your loved ones look up to? You know, those people that really matter in your life that need you to show up every day? The ones that need you to suck it up and go to another day at your shitty job so the bills are paid. 

We all would love to lead a more glamorous lifestyle. When we get the chance to do something a little more fancy than normal we rub it in everyone’s faces. Be honest, we all do it. It’s fun, and we want everyone to know we are having fun. 

The challenge is to find just as much pride in the day to day events that truly represent your life. 

Short story: Glint in the sand

Glint in the sand

Barry loved to walk on the beach. The way the water soaked into the soft sand with each receding wave always seemed to make him smile. Today was no different as he strolled a short distance from his parents.

Barry and his family came to this beach often during the summer. It wasn’t uncommon for mom and dad to relax while he wandered for a bit after they laid out their towels. He enjoyed the solitude.

This afternoon saw them mostly alone as the forecast called for bad weather beginning in the evening. A storm was rolling up the coast, and they wanted to get a visit in as the pending weekend threatened to be filled with rain.

Barry hadn’t gotten very far when something caught his eye. A small sparkle just before a wave rolled in. He paused and waited for the water to return to the gulf in hopes of getting another view of the shiny object. Sure enough, he saw the glint again as the sand began to dry.

Crouching over the object he could make out the edge of a coin. Larger than a quarter, but smaller than a half dollar. It looked old and worn. Barry got excited. Could he have really found the treasure? Dad told stories of the pirates that used to call upon these shores so many years ago. That these beaches could hold untold fortunes for those lucky enough to find them.

Not wanting to lose sight of his prize, he reached…

“Ah, I’ve been looking for that!”

Barry jumped not realizing a stranger had been standing behind him.

“I’m sorry sir, I didn’t know it belonged to anyone. I thought it might be a treasure.”
The man chuckled “It is a treasure, of sorts. Go ahead. Take a look”

Barry retrieved the coin and went to return it to its rightful owner.

The man put up a hand and said. “No, please take a look. This is a special coin. One that is very rare, and you may never see another like it”.

He crouched next to Barry. “What do you see?”

Barry turned the coin over and examined both sides. It was tarnished and had a square hole in the middle. The edges were jagged but worn smooth from years of being exposed to the elements. One of the sides had some kind of writing or symbols he hadn’t seen before. The other had a picture of a mountain with what looked like a beam of light that shone down onto a river with a small boat.

“You’re right! I haven’t seen one like this before. Is it old?”

“Oh yes! Very old.” He said leaning closer. “This coin here has quite the story. Would you like to hear it?”

Barry was intrigued. He wanted to learn about this coin’s history but thought it odd that this man didn’t just want something this valuable back right away. Not as odd though as the fact he was wearing a dark suit on the beach in the middle of summer, or that he smelled like a campfire. At the moment he was more interested in the story.

“Yes, please tell me about it.”

“Of course young man! This coin once sat at the top of a very tall mountain in a place far from here. Each morning, as the sun rose, the light would shine through this hole here in the center and down onto a river far below. The legend was that anyone that stood in the beam of light while it showed on the water would be endowed with great powers. The problem was, that when the light was shining on the water it created an incredible whirlpool in the river.”

“Did anyone ever get the superpowers?” Barry asked.

“No. Even the bravest man wouldn’t dare venture into such conditions, however, one day a young man climbed to the top of the mountain and tried to take the coin. He thought that if he pointed it in a different direction, it would cast its light in a safer area. One that would allow him to gain the powers he so desperately wanted. What he didn’t know was that it was cursed, and not just anyone could hold it. The coin shot from his hand, and he fell from the peak into the tempest below. He and this coin were not seen again.”

“I don’t think it has any magic,” Barry said.

“Oh, and what makes you think that?”

“Because I can hold it, and nothing bad has happened to me.”

The stranger leaned very close grinning. “I noticed that very same thing!”

“BARRY!!” He looked up just as a large wave crashed ashore knocking him off his feet.

“Are you OK?” Dad asked helping him up. “Didn’t you hear me calling you? This storm is coming in, and your mom went to get the car. It’s time to go.”

Barry hadn’t noticed the turn in the weather. It was raining, and the waves were coming in quickly now.

“But, I lost it! Where did it go?”

“What did you lose Barry?”

“It was a really old coin, and this man was telling me this story…”

“Barry, we are the only ones out here. Come on, we need to go before it gets any worse.”

“Uh… OK, let’s go, Dad.” He took a quick glance at the sand around him. Both the coin and the storyteller were gone.

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This is the first story I’ve published on the blog and would love some feedback. Please feel free to leave comments, or reach out using my contact form.